How to Avoid Overscheduling as a Busy ADHD Mom | ADHD Time Management
Is being “busy” just part of life as a mom now?
Is it possible to raise well rounded, activity immersed children AND create a successful business without feeling overwhelmed or experiencing FOMO?
As far fetched as that dream may sound, I do believe it is possible when you actively work to control your schedule rather than letting your schedule control you.
Taking back control of your schedule helps you find time and space for what you truly value.
Time for the priorities you’ve set for family, your business, and yourself.
And whatever fear or struggle you had in letting go of events that don’t tick those boxes will dissipate quickly as you back in the new found time and energy you’ve create by protecting yourself.
So keep reading for 3 steps to help you take back control of your schedule and a freebie to help you evaluate which activities you can or should say “yes” to in the future.
How to Avoid Overscheduling
Moms LOVE to say yes.
We love to be involved. We love to help. We hate to feel like we are letting people down. Especially our kids.
BUT what happens when all those yeses compound to create a schedule that feels stressful and overwhelming?
An anxious, stressed out, overstimulated, unfulfilled mom entrepreneur is what happens.
But today, we’re going to try to fix that by giving you tools to take back control of your schedule.
And trust me, as a recovering people pleaser, I know how hard it is to turn people down for fear of disappointing them or that if you don’t do it, no one will.
But here’s the thing…When you stand up for your time, your values, and your goals, you will start to see your life align.
The creative energy you previously spent fulfilling someone else’s vision can now be spent on your own.
The time and effort you applied to reaching someone else’s goal is reallocated to your goals.
You can find ways to fill your cup, whether it’s for personal or business reasons, on a daily basis because you stop or limit what you are pouring out to others.
And when your energy isn’t diluted from overcommitment, you can show up present at your kid’s events without thinking about other 100 things you have to do afterwards.
You can devote focused effort to an organization or project you feel truly passionate about rather than giving the bare minimum to help them succeed.
Over time, you and your family will start to see that less truly is more when it comes to your schedule.
And if you’re a “yes” mom and sitting there thinking “there is no way I can change my schedule. This is just the way it is going to be until my kids get older” Or “no one else can do it like me. It has to be me.” I have a truth bomb for you.
You do have a choice. You can make a change and stand up for the life you want. Or you can continue to complain and live that life that everyone else wants from you.
It is your choice.
So if you’re ready to stop the stressful overscheduling and start scheduling with purpose and intention, let’s dive into my 3 strategies to scale back your commitments.
And when it comes to scaling back, it’s all about “knowing”… Knowing where we need to be, knowing what space we need around that activity, and knowing when to say “yes” to adding a task, project, or activity to our already overloaded schedule.
3 Steps to Stop Overscheduling
Know Your Schedule
To be honest, this is where you mamas are killing it.
I would bet dollars to donuts that a majority of you maintain some sort of family and business calendar because otherwise, life would be abject chaos.
So kudos to you.
Where I see struggles start to arise with clients and in my community is when you’ve got a digital shared family calendar over here and a separate planner for your business commitments over there.
So even though we have these calendars and they’re up to date, there’s a chance you end up with a 1-hr work Zoom call scheduled at 5pm and a kid who needs picked up from soccer at 530pm. Whoops!
That is why I highly recommend finding a way that works for you to see the whole picture. It could be keeping separate Google calendars so you can see everything on your phone or computer.
Or maybe you would prefer to take some time on Sundays to review a physical planner or calendar for the upcoming week to see who needs to be where when and where any potential overlaps or tights spots might be so you can problem solve more the 10 minutes ahead of time.
Knowing our schedule leads us to the next thing we need to know which is…
Know What Space You Need In Your Schedule
You know your child has a piano lesson at 430pm.
You also know you have a meeting that is supposed to end at 4.
And you know it takes 20 minutes to get to the piano lesson.
That’s running it pretty close…especially if the meeting runs over. Or there’s traffic. Or you can’t find your keys.
So if we’re trying to avoid that fluttery feeling that we’re going to be late AGAIN, we need to give ourselves some margin or a buffer zone.
That continuous slamming of activity into activity is a huge factor in the anxiety we feel when we’re overscheduled.
There is no transition time. And we need breathing room.
So when you look at the schedules for you, your business, your kids, and your spouse layered on top of each other, do you have enough (or any) transition time or buffer space?
If not, it may not be the actual number of activities that is causing you to feel overwhelmed by your schedule, but the fact that there is never a minute to catch your breath in between.
Know When to Say “Yes”
ADHDers love to say yes.
We love to be helpful and involved. We don’t like to let people down.
And we definitely don’t wanna miss out on the fun.
But in our rush to say yes to everything and everyone, we often say no to ourselves which can lead to feeling overwhelmed and burned out.
That’s why I want to wrap up today by sharing 10 simple questions that you can answer in a minute or so that may help you slow down enough to make a more conscious decision on whether or not to add this activity or opportunity to your busy schedule.
Because when you start to fill your schedule with activities that bring value, that you actually want to do, that you love to do, or that will bring you joy, you will feel less overwhelmed or resentful because you are cognizant of each and every item you add to your schedule.
And as a bonus, I’ve made you a printable sheet with all 10 questions that you can download by clicking here.
So here are the 10 questions to ask yourself before you say “yes”...
1. Do you want to do this?
2. Does it require your specific expertise?
3. Do you have time in your schedule for this?
4. Does this align with your values?
5. Will it take time away from yourself or your family?
6. Will it take time away from your work?
7. Is it a priority?
8. Will it take time away from something else that is a priority?
9. Could someone else do this?
10. Will there be an opportunity for me to do this in the future?
Remember you can download my free printable of these 10 Questions to ask before you say yes by clicking here.
Print them right away so a) you don’t forget and b) they’re ready to use the next time you catch yourself wanting to say yes but wondering if you actually have the time, effort, and energy for it.
And if you found yourself saying “I just don’t know if I time for this” or “I’m not really sure what my priorities are”, I’m here to help.
My coaching program is specifically designed to help ADHD mom business owners set manageable goals based on your priorities, break those goals into manageable tasks and figure out when you’ll work on them, and follow through to completion.
If you’d like to see how I can support you in reducing your schedule overwhelm and reaching your goals, click the button below to schedule your free, no-obligation 15 minute call to discuss how I can help.
